Testing

Progress

The past week or so has been filled with a Dr. appointment for my first fill, a fabulous first trip to Trader Joes in Ann Arbor and a return to work.


So, first the fill. It went really well, and I survived.  The night before I could not sleep for love nor money and was still awake at 3AM. Uggh...   I think it had more to do with finally getting to go to Trader Joes than the fill.  My appt. was early and it takes over an hour to get there, so I was up at 7AM.  I was in and out for the fill in about 20 minutes.  I wasn't nervous until Dr. S came in and started talking to me and filling up the syringe.  But he is super fast, thank God and it was no worse than getting your blood drawn.  He put in 3 cc.
I made my next appointment, for 4 weeks (March 30) and off I went.


Found TJ's with zero problem, and had some fun shopping at a new store.  I found some great new food items, that will be perfect for my protein intake.  And very good deals too. I love a good deal!


My first day back to work was that night.  Just a sleeping shift, but it was great to be back and starting back on a routine schedule.  I was able to pick up some extra shifts which is also great.  


On a completely different topic, Sunday I started having back pain and discomfort in my upper left and right quadrants.  It feels eerily like when I had my gallstone attack a year ago.  This is not good.  I was feeling it yesterday too while at work and last night was really bad.  Tylenol helped and the pain dissipated, but I'm a little concerned.  I've got no time to be dealing with this, and I can't afford to be off of work anymore.  I'm going to monitor it and the symptoms and go from there, but I am cautiously optimistic.  


Ending on a good note: As of March 2, I am down 12 lbs. and 19 inches total.  Wohoo!!! 

New Day

Well, it's a new day, and a new start.  So far, so good.  The rest of the weekend went pretty well.  Although, to keep things honest here, I sucked when I was at Sarah's.  I ate 2 Valentine snack cakes, and 3 pieces of the boy's chocolate crispy valentine candy.  And way too much, not 100% fruit juice.  Bad, bad, bad!!.  But Sunday was better.

For breakfast today: 3/4 c. 1% cottage cheese and a fruit smoothie made with skim milk.  Maybe I'll start taking pics of my meals, I've noticed while blog hopping that this is a popular thing to do.  Hmmm.. we'll see.

Today

So far so good, today. I got up at 8:15a, unloaded/loaded the dishwasher and made myself breakfast. And started a load of laundry.  The sun is shining again today.  Praise to my Lord for never giving up on me, you gave me one more day of sunshine to enjoy (finally got a clue), before the temperature drop and rain coming tomorrow.

2 scrambled eggs with 3 slices of Canadian bacon and a sprinkle of cheese, and Tbsp of ketchup (i know not low in sugar). Oh and OJ. Total so far is: 346 cal. and 32.1 g. protein (Half way to my daily goal which is 63) and 20.1 g fat.  The calories are  and fat are a little high. I'm thinking maybe i'll try 1 whole egg and then an egg white.  I ate all of it and it was too much.  Remember to slow down....
I logged everything in my FIT DAY account.

I still need to take my pills and vitamin.  I'm off to Sarah and Jim's to play "Jonesie" aka "Indiana Jones" on X-Box with the Wyatt monster.  Can't wait !

Passing Time

I can't believe how much time has passed since surgery day, nearly a month. Actually a month tomorrow! Since surgery, I've been in a funk. Some days are good and positive and I am productive, but more often than not, they are filled with a whole lot of nothing. Keep in mind, the first two weeks I could not drive and then I couldn't afford to drive (literally). It was pretty much last Thursday that I was finally able to get out by myself.

Sarah came and visited once or twice and I went over to her house once or twice, seriously though all the days are blurring together. My 2-week follow-up ended up being a 3-week one and it was not a happy one for me. I only lost 5 lbs in 3-weeks!! I swear it felt like more and I'm guessing that before I started pureed food at week 2 I had lost more and then started gaining. Not a happy or encouraging sign. Of course, I also have not been walking, again it was cold and the snow and.... how many more excuses do you want cause i can give them. But that is all they are, excuses.

The past 2 days have been beautiful and I only stepped outside to get the mail. Of course, (excuse coming) I have felt like crap since Tuesday night. Still feeling pretty yucky, but my excuses need to stop! I get to go back to work on March 2, thank you Jesus!. I have no routine, I'm not getting enough protein, or H2O or walking and I'm not taking my vitamins. Gee, is there anything I'm doing right? In fairness, most of the time I would say 70% I don't feel hunger. But, I still need to eat something even if it's just a couple tablespoons of food.

I'm frustrated, a little depressed, angry at myself for doing the same things, making the same mistakes and never changing. What I do know is, tomorrow is another day and I can do different and better tomorrow.

Anyway, I think I'm babbling now, so I will stop.

Surgery Day

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Originally uploaded by Jennifer Maxwell

It's taken me nearly a week to write this post, and I'm still not sure how it's going to turn out. Due to the weather and the fact that I was not the one driving, my friend Melissa and I went up to Ypsilanti the night before. She was kind enough to pay for a lovely hotel room and I was able to get a good night's sleep.

Tuesday morning came, surgery day! We were both up with plenty of time to spare, I showered we took "before" pics and measurements and we were off to the hospital. I checked in got some additional blood work taken and walked up to Pre-Op. I was up there for a couple hours, Mel was able to come up and sit with me for awhile. Everyone was great, lots of double checking on information which is great. I spoke to the Anesthesiologist and he promised to be gentle with me persnickety baby tooth on the bottom. Eventually Dr. S came in and checked my chart, took my hand and said a prayer.

Truly, it was the most peace I've felt with any major decision I have made. Regardless of the outcome I felt safe with him and safe in the arms of Jesus. I had no worries, no butterflies, just true peace. It was beautiful.

I was out of surgery around 11AM (about 35 minutes or so) and groggily waking up I believe around 11:20 or so. I'm not entirely sure as my eyes were super blurry and I had no glasses at first.

The rest of the day went by pretty quickly and we left the hospital around 4:30 ish, I think?. I was pretty tired and mostly just uncomfortable not as much pain, per se. But I had the liquid Vicodin just in case. I slept for a very long time once I got home.

More to come later on how the week has gone, but suffice it to say tomorrow is pureed food start day and I cannot wait!

Memories and the Future

Beginning next Monday upon waking, I will be on clear liquids only, until surgery on Tuesday, January 18th.
It's getting so close, and I am as ready as I think I can be.  The caffeine withdrawal hasn't sucked, but mostly because I haven't stopped completely. Since last Wednesday I have only had 1 large Diet Coke from McDonald's each day. The reason it's from McD's is because it's only $1 and I am completely broke.  In fact I don't believe I have enough dimes left to make $1 today.  So today may be the day I am officially without soda.  I waited until about 5p yesterday before I went and got one, I was craving it so bad, it was pitiful.
The only thing a person should love that much is Jesus!  And he will be the one who leads me through to the other side.
Although I am mentally ready for this, there are still things I have to take care of. Groceries and supplies to buy, I have lists and such just no money yet.  I am off today and tomorrow and then work Wednesday-Monday.
I think I will grocery/supply shop on Thursday (payday!!) after work and then I promised Judd I would come over to see him and Wyatt.  He asked me if I was still working on the picture book (scrapbook of mom) of his "grandma in heaven".  I just about cried, I showed it to him when he was here last and he was very interested in it.  I told him it wasn't finished and that I had lots more pictures and stories to do and he said he wants to help.  So I said I would bring it on Thursday and to get his markers ready.  Sometimes it's so hard to think about how much she is missing.  Christmas was extra hard this year for me, I think because Judd was so into Santa this year and singing Christmas tunes that I used to as a kid.  He was singing right along with Elvis and Burl Ives, even when the music wasn't playing.  It was and is bittersweet for me and for Sarah and Cindy I know.  Mom adored Christmas and that time of the year was always the best.  She did everything she could no matter how little money she had to make it the very best for us.  She was the greatest mother a girl could ever hope for and I miss her.  She would have loved those boys and L so much.  I know that she is watching over us and I know that she is with us in the good times and the bad.  I just want to find a way to convey to the boys who she was, what her heart was and help them to "know" her just a little.
Well, now that I'm tearing up, I think that is my cue to wrap it up. But here's a little something to make you smile: Judd at 4 years old @ Aunt Cindy and Uncle Pete's wedding reception in 2009 He clearly got his dancing moves from me John Travolta